Profile Quotes
by Aristania
Summary: Exactly what the title says. I don't know if anyone actually reads these, but I thought it might be nice if you had the option rather than having them thrown at you.
**So to save room, here are all of the quotes that I've picked up from other profiles. Hope you enjoy them, because I know that I do.**

Stupid Racist People...

A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."  
The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:

"When I was born I was black,"  
"When I grew up I was black,"  
"When I'm sick I'm black,"  
"When I go in the sun I'm black,"  
"When I'm cold I'm black,"  
"When I die I'll be black."

"But you sir..."  
"When you're born you're pink,"  
"When you grow up you're white,"  
"When you're sick, you're green,"  
"When you go in the sun you turn red,"  
"When you're cold you turn blue,"  
"And when you die you turn purple."  
"And yet you have the nerve to call me colored"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

Copy this onto your site and help stop racism!

If you HATE child abusing like me copy and paste this to your profile.

My name is Sarah

I am but three

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see

I must be stupid

I must be bad

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren't ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all

I can't do a wrong

Or else I'm locked up

All the day long

When I awake I'm all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren't home.

When my mommy does come

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe I'll get just

One whipping tonight

Don't make a sound!

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse

My name he calls

I press myself

Against the wall.

I try and hide

From his evil eyes

I'm so afraid now

I'm starting to cry.

He finds me weeping

He shouts ugly words,

He says its my fault

That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And I run for the door.

He's already locked it

And I start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!", I scream

But its now much too late

His face has been twisted

Into unimaginable hate.

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

Oh please God, have mercy!

Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door,

While I lay there motionless

Sprawled on the floor.

My name is Sarah

And I am but three,

Tonight my daddy,

Murdered me.

Child abuse, MAKE IT STOP!

()()  
(0.0)  
( _ )

This is a bunny.  
Copy the bunny onto your profile to help him achieve world domination.  
Come join the dark side. (We have cookies)

 ** **All of these were copied and pasted from Wicked Gothic Angel's profile. Go check it out! BloodDove01 too, if you have time!****

London Times Obituary of the late Mr. Common Sense

'Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets theworm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Elastoplast to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.'

Posted from Death Fox101's profile.

You know you live in 2010 when:

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screenname or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.

ONLY IN AMERICA...

...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance

...are there handicap parking spaces in front of ice-skating rinks

...sick people go to the back of Walgreens to get their medicine, while healthy people get their cigarettes at the front

...people buy hotdogs in packs of 10 and hotdog buns in packs of 8

...the banks leave both vaults open and then chain the pens to the counter

...people order a double cheese burger, large fries, and a diet coke

...people leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveways and keep their junk in garages

...people use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so they won't miss the calls from someone they don't want to talk to in the first place

...is the word "politics" used to describe the process so well; "Poli-" in latin means "many" and "tics" mean "blood-sucking creatures

Have you ever considered suing your brain for non-support?

Who was so mean to put an "s" in the word "lisp" if people with lisps can't say the "s"?

Doctors say TV is bad for us, but why is there a TV in every hospital room?

If McDonald's loves to see you smile why do they screw up your order?

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If con is the opposite of pro is Congress the opposite of progress?

Donald Duck never wears pants, but why does he wraps a towel around his waist when he gets out of the shower?

Controversial Issues:  
1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.  
2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.  
3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.  
4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.  
5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britney Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.  
6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.  
7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.  
8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.  
9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.  
10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans...  
Re-post this if you believe in legalizing gay marriage.

Things I'm not allowed to do at Hogwarts.

1) Seamus Finnigan is not after me lucky charms

2) I do not weigh the same as a duck. Nor should I try to act like one.

3) "I've heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.

4) I will not sing "we're off to see the wizard" when sent to the Headmaster's office.

5) I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class

6) I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss

7) Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda

8) Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar

9) First years are not allowed to be fed to Fluffy

10) I will not make any jokes about Lupin and his "time of the month"

11) I will not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals

12) I will not sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin quidditch matches

13) The Giant Squid is not an approriate date to the Yule Ball

14) When Death-Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout "To the Bat Moblie, Robin!"

15) When a class-mate falls asleep, I shall not take advantage of the fact and draw a Dark Mark on his arm.

16) It's not necessary for me to yell "BURN!" every time Snape takes house points from Gryffindor

17) Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is simply coincidental

18) I will not call the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny. Even if he is wearing an orange anorak

19) I will not refer to the Weasley Twins as "bookends"

20) I will ont dress up in a Dementor's suit and use a dustbuster on Harry's lips to make him do what I want.

21) I will not scare the Arithmancy students with my Calculus book.

22) I will not hold my wand in the air before I casting spells shouting "I got the power!"

23) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that the Knights who say Ni have challenged him to a duel and then have students yell "Ni!" from various directions.

24) I am not Xena: Warrior Princess and I shall not use war cries to signal my entrance when I enter a classroom

25) Its not necessary for me to yell "Bam!" everytime I apparate.

26) I will not steal Griffyndor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallway.

27) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music when wandering the halls.

28) "To conquer the earth with flying monkeys" is not an appropriate career choice.

29) I am not allowed to begin Herbology class by singing the theme song to "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes"

30) I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue and call them smurfs.

31) The Whomping Willow is not an Entwife

32) "Draco Malfoy, Take it up the Arse" is not an acceptable quidditch chant.

34) I am not Allowed to lock Harry Potter and Draco Malfoyin a closet to see if hot gay sex will occur.

34) It is a mad idea to tell Proffesor Mcgonagal that she takes herself too seriously

35) "Ya'll check this crap out!" is not an aprropriate way to announce that I am about to conduct an expirimental spell.

36) I will not say the phrase "Dude, get a life" to Voldemort.

37) I will not offer to pose nude for Collin Creevy.

38) I am no longer allowed to use the words "pimp cane" in front of Draco Malfoy.

39) Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I should not start singing anything from The Phantom of the Opera.

40) Dumbledore does not have "nakie time".

16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1\. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2\. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3\. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4\. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,  
" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5\. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6\. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7\. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8\. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,  
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9\. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10\. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11\. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12\. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13\. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,  
say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14\. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..  
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!"

15\. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16\. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"

WHAT TO DO IN AN EXAM…

1\. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!"

2\. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure that you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

3\. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.

4\. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.

5\. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.

6\. 15 min. into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every 15 min.

7\. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.

8\. Come down with a BAD case of Tourette's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible.

9\. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.

10\. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.

11\. Every 5 min. stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.

12\. Turn in the exam approx. 30 min. into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.

13\. Get the exam. 20 min into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "THIS IS STUPID!" and walk out triumphantly.

14\. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (ie. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink.)

15\. Show up completely drunk (completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy).

16\. Comment on how cute the instructor is looking that day.

17\. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 min, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away.

18\. If the exam is math/sciences related, make up the longest proofs you could possible think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.

19\. Try to get people in the room to do a wave.

20\. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.

21\. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.

22\. Puke into your exam booklet. Hand it in. Leave.

23\. Take 6 packages of rice cakes to the exam. Stuff at least 2 rice cakes into your mouth at once. Chew, then cough. Repeat if necessary.

24\. Masturbate.

25\. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About 5 min into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the heck are you? Where's the regular guy?"

26\. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up!

27\. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.

28\. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"

29\. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.

30\. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.

31\. In the middle of the test, have a friend rush into the classroom, tag your hand, and resume taking your test for you. When the teacher asks what's going on, calmly explain the rules of Tag Team Testing to him/her.

32\. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."

33\. Stand up after about 15 minutes, and say loudly, "Okay, let's double-check our answers! Number one, A. Number two, C. Number three, E..."

34\. Fake an orgasm. When interrupted, apologize, and explain that question #5 moved you, deeply.

35\. Wear a superman outfit under your normal clothes. 30 minutes into the exam, jump up and answer your phone, shouting "What? I'm on my way!". rip off your outer clothes and run out of the room. strike a pose first for added effect.

36\. Tailgate outside the classroom before the exam.

37\. If your answers are on a scantron sheet, fill it out in pen.

38\. Bring a giant cockroach into the room and release it on a girl nearby.

39\. Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle.

40\. Bring one pencil with a very sharp point. Break the point off your paper. Sharpen the pencil. Repeat this process for one hour.

41\. Make Strange noises... get people to stare... look at the person next to you as if heshe did it.

42\. Dress like the professor.

43\. If your a boy wear a hot pink dress

44\. Use Invisible Ink to answer the whole exam.

45\. Order catering. The catering company should come in about halfway through the test, and should include at least three waiters, eight carts of food, and five candelabras

Repost this if you laughed...  
Or are planning to do any of these things

You're a 90's kid if:

You can finish this 'ice ice _'  
You remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, Bobby's World, Felix the cat, The Tick...AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!  
You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"  
You just cant resist finishing this . . . "Iiiiiiin west philidelphia born and raised . . ."  
You remember TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World.  
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.  
You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.  
You remember reading "Goosebumps"  
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.  
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not  
If you remember seeing hot tub bubbles make bubbly sounds before every music video on VH1.  
when everything was settled by rock paper scissors..or bubble gum bubble gum in a dish...eeny meeny miney mo...and even better daddy had a donkey inky binky bonky.  
You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.  
"Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.  
Captain Planet. He's a Hero.  
You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together.  
You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.  
You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny.  
You remember watching Home Alone 1, 2 , and 3 . . . and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"  
You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.  
You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.  
You remember those Where's Waldo books.  
You remember eating Warheads.  
You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Ninja Turtles, and 3 Ninjas movies.  
You remember Ring Pops.  
You remember drinking Surge, and Tang.  
If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"  
When they made the new lunchables so that you could make pizza AND tacos.  
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.  
Making those little paper cootie-catcher things, and then predicting your life with them.  
You played and/or collected "Pogs"  
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and brought it everywhere.  
. . . Furbies  
Saved By The Bell was the coolest show ever!  
You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.  
And Windows 95 was the best.  
You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.  
Michael Jordan was a king.  
YIKES pencils and erasers were the stuff!  
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.  
You remember when the new Beanie Babies and Talking Elmo were always sold out.  
You collected those Beanie Babies.  
Mortal Kombat was awesome-the game and the movie  
Carebears  
Gak was the coolest stuff invented.  
Lambchop's song never ended.  
The old dollar bills.  
Silver dollars, which were cool to have.  
You remember a time before the WB.  
You collected all the Troll dolls  
You had to read Weekly Reader's in class.

If you even know what an original walkman is.

You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.

You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" (  
You know the Macarena by heart.  
"Talk to the hand" . . . enough said  
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it?!"  
You remember trying to collect all 150 original pokemon cards but never could and if you did you thought you were all that!  
You remember Highlight's magazine.  
You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace.  
You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.  
Before the MySpace frenzy . . .  
Before the Internet & text messaging . . .  
Before Sidekicks & iPods . . .  
Before MIKE JONES . . .  
Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX . . .  
Before Spongebob . . .  
Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.  
When light up sneakers were cool.  
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.  
When gas was 0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was The new thing.  
When we recorded stuff on VCRs.  
When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off of our walkmans.  
When gameboy was a brick.  
You did MASH to figure out your future  
When you weren't cool unless you had a Starter jacket.  
Way back.

Before we realized all this would eventually disappear.  
Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!  
Post this in your profile if you remember these days . . . .  
or if you smiled at one of these things.

(I found this really cool if you can read it pasted in your profile please)

If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile!

''I would if I could but I can't so I won't'' - person

''Forgive your enemies but never forget their names'' - Some old U.S president

''I would tell you but then I would have to kill you, and we don't want that, do we?'' - Person

"Be nice to your enemies, it might just confuse them." - Bumper Sticker

"When life gives you lemons, make grapejuice. Then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it" - Bumper sticker

"Gods last name is not danmit!" - Bumper sticker

"People think I must be a very strange person. This is not correct. I have the heart of a small boy...It is in a glass jar on my desk." - Stephen King

"Beloved, let us love one another for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God, for God is love." 1 John 4:7-8

20 ways to maintain a healthy level of insanity:

1: At lunch time, sit in you car with sunglasses on and point a hair dry at passing cars; see if they slow down

2: Page yourself over the intercom. Do not disguise your voice.

3: Every time some one asks you to do something, ask them if they want fries with that

4: Put you garbage can on your desk and label it "IN"

5: Put decaf in the coffee maker (home or work). When everyone gets over their caffeine addiction, switch to espresso

6: In your memo book, on all your checks, put "FOR SMUGGLING DIAMONDS"

7: Finish all your sentences with "In Accordance To The Prophecy"

8: Dont use any punctuation

9: As often as possible, skip instead of walking

10: Order diet water whenever you go out with a serious face

11: Specify that your drive-thru order is "TO GO"

12: Sing along at the opera

13: Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme

14: Put mosquito netting around your work area (or room) and play tropical sounds all day

15: 5 days in advance, tell your friend that you can't go to their party cause you don't 'feel like it'

16: Have friends or coworkers address you by your wrestling name "Rock Bottom"

17: When the cash comes out of the ATM yell, "I WON, I WON"

18: When exiting the zoo, start running toward the parking lot, yelling, "Run for your lives they're loose"

19: Tell your children (or younger sibling) that "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go"

20: And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity is... Copy this and put it on your profile!

Everything I Learned In Life, I Learned From CLAMP

1\. If you're not angsty, you should be.  
2\. There is no such thing as coincidence.  
3\. Evil takes the form of four Japanese mangaka.  
4\. Everything's better in alternate universes.  
5\. If you're precious to your brother, you're probably doomed.  
6\. Actually, if you're precious to anyone, you're doomed.  
7\. In fact, you're probably just doomed anyways.  
8\. Treasure your eyes. You never know when they'll be taken away.  
9\. Subtext really does equal buttsex.  
10\. Everything has a price.  
11\. The most powerful people are alcoholics.  
12\. Never trust the bunny/pork bun.  
13\. True love always prevails. Usually.  
14\. Love comes in all forms.  
15\. At least you're not Subaru.  
16\. Nothing says love like agreeing to be somebody's primary food source.  
17\. If someone comments on your eyes being pretty, you will probably lose them several chapters later.  
18\. Even if you and your beloved are a canon couple, by the end, you still won't have kissed.  
19\. Even in other series, you still will not kiss.  
20\. If your grandparents are constantly on vacation, they most likely don't exist.  
21\. Never carry your most treasured item around with you.  
22\. Everybody has an evil twin.  
23\. Tokyo Tower is, more than likely, the source of all evil.  
24\. If you're good-looking, you're doomed or angsty. Probably both.  
25\. Don't expect to live a happy life. You'll only be disappointed.  
26\. The more they smile, the harder they fall.  
27\. Your fan base is directly proportional to how angsty you are.  
28\. Everyone is pretty, even when bleeding or in agony.  
29\. Torture and mind games are just another way of showing you care.  
30\. Your boss is bad for you.  
31\. The world is split into three genders: male, female and androgynous.  
32\. Blood is aesthetic.  
33\. It's not real magic unless you can conjure a two-meter-wide magic circle.  
34\. Flat strips of paper can reach the same speed as an F1 race car.  
35\. Fire doesn't burn unless the plot requires it to.  
36\. No matter how ripped your shirt gets, it's not coming off.  
37\. Men with black hair and glasses (including sunglasses) cannot be trusted.  
38\. Anyone who says having magic powers is cool could not have been more wrong.  
39\. It's possible to store two swords and enough clothing for four people inside the mouth of a bunny/pork bun.  
40\. Who wears short shorts? Little boy detectives wear short shorts!  
41\. Four leaf clovers aren't as lucky as they're made out to be.  
42\. If you're a character voiced by Megumi Ogata/cool/fan favourite/bishounen, you're doomed.  
43\. Hell, you're in a CLAMP anime. You're doomed.  
44\. Remember your dreams- they're the key to the plot.  
45\. If you can't whistle, "hyuu" instead.  
46\. If you feel someone's watching you, they probably are.  
47\. If he's tall, dark and handsome, he's taken- by the outrageously cute boy standing next to him.  
48\. Feathers have the ultimate power. Buy a chicken.  
49\. If your series is happy sugar-coated fairies and gay, you will most likely all die a horrible death at the hand of a psychotic clone.  
50\. Everything will be alright.  
51\. Just because you return from a journey, doesn't mean you'll return in one piece.  
52\. Everything happens in Tokyo.  
53\. Cute stuffed animals make the best magical servants.  
54\. Swords longer than your height are easy to manage.  
55\. Attack names/chants are more important than actual skill or experience.  
56\. Cherry blossoms are a sign of good luck.  
57\. Cherry blossoms are a sign of bad luck.  
58\. Cherry blossoms are- sod that, if you see cherry blossoms, run.  
59\. Even after your heart is pierced by someone's hand, you will still have plenty of time to divulge deep dark secrets/words of wisdom/angst/last words before you actually die.  
60\. Show your true love not by exchanging rings, but eyes.  
61\. No one is really happy. They're just hiding some dark secret.  
62\. Dressing someone up in cute but outlandish outfits is a sign of great love and affection.  
63\. The easiest way to solve a love triangle is to kill somebody.  
64\. Inanimate objects have feelings.  
65\. Eyes, especially magic ones, are in high demand.  
66\. Cosplay is completely normal in Tokyo.  
67\. Love your parents while you can.  
68\. The general public is oblivious to strange/supernatural/inexplicable/mysterious events/people/objects.  
69\. Don't give your name to strangers.  
70\. Wherever you are, there is a Miyuki somewhere in the background.  
71\. Apparently, magic allows you to eat other people's eyes like candy.  
72\. Walking between a fence and a lamp-post will send you to another time/dimension.  
73\. Never trust shop owners.  
74\. You can adore liquor more than food, but you do not have an alcohol problem.  
75\. Everyone who's important, has the birthday April 1st.  
76\. It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye-then it's a pairing.  
77\. Nothing says love than agreeing to be someone's primary life source.  
78\. When asking the Japanese what a word means, definitions don't matter, you just need Kanji  
79\. Nothing says love like telling them to live till the day you kill them  
80\. Nothing says love like placing varius suffixes onto the end of the first four letters of their name

 ** **Thought this was hilarious! Posted from jessica499499's profile. Check it out!****

Copy and Paste

IF YOU HAVE EVER HAD THE SUDDEN DESIRE TO OWN A TAZER...

If you probably have a body in your closet…

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your ass off.

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer…

If people think you are mentally insane...

If you're random and proud of it…

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation…

If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one…

If you've ever talked to yourself…

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it…

If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water…

If you haven't died yet…

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?"…

Copy and Paste this into your profile to join the Revolution; because everyone knows how much it sucks when you have 500 hits and 3 reviews...

Stop the Pairing Wars!  
By copying and pasting this in your profile, you vow to respect other pairings and the people that like them.  
You shalt not insult them, explain why they can't be together, or say that they would rather be with someone else.  
You shalt have your opinions but shalt not insult pairings.  
You shalt avoid them if you hate them.  
You shalt keep an open mind about stories even if you despise the pairing.  
You shalt paste this in your profile.

The "You no like, you no read" club: If you believe that people who don't like someone's story should simply not read it instead of posting cruel and hateful reviews, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Alicia's Purple Velvet Purse, changelingchild, crimsonchidori, SasukeSakuraxXXxItachiSakura, Angry Fox Girl, ItAsAkU-LoVeR, SkywardShadow, HopeInHell, Smileyface-Kitsune, ncfan, NorthernShinigami, LaughingFreak, Aristania

 ** **The above was posted from Laughing Freak's profile.****

If you don't have a problem with homosexuality, copy this into your profile.

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get, like, two reviews, copy this into your profile.

If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Fred should just let Barney have the freakin' Coco Pebbles and stop chasing him, then copy and paste this in your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever fallen up the stairs, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile. =D

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?" copy this into your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school  
He told his friends that it was cool  
And when he pulled the trigger back  
It shot with a great crack  
Mummy I was a good girl  
I did what I was told  
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold  
But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye  
I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry  
When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another  
And all because he got the gun from his older brother  
Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much  
And please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush  
And tell my little sister that she is the only one now  
And tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now  
And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best  
Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest  
Mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class  
And never to forget this and please don't let this pass  
Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this  
Mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss  
And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try  
I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry  
Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest  
But mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest  
Mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack  
Mummy listen to me if you would  
I wanted to go to college  
I wanted to try things that were new  
I guess I'm not going with daddy  
On that trip to the new zoo  
I wanted to get married  
I wanted to have a kid  
I wanted to be an actress  
Mummy I wanted to live  
But mummy I must go now  
The time is getting late  
Mummy tell my Chris  
I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date  
I love you mummy I always have  
I know you know it's true  
Mummy all I wanted to say is "mummy I love you"  
In memory of the Colombian students that were lost  
Please if you would  
Pass this aroundI'd be happy if you could  
Don't smash this on the ground  
If you pass this on  
Maybe people will cry  
Just keep this in heart  
For the people that didn't get to say "goodbye"

Now you have two choices 1)repost and show you care 2)ignore it and you have just proved you have a low-down, cold-heart

WHAT EACH KISS MEANS

Kiss on the Upper chest; I'm ready.

-Kiss on the Forehead; We're cute together .

Kiss on the Cheek; We're friends.

-Kiss on the Hand; I adore you.

-Kiss on the Neck; I want you, now.

-Kiss on the Shoulder; Your perfect.

-Kiss on the Lips; I think I like you.

WHAT A GESTURE MEANS  
-Holding Hands; We definitely like each other.

-Slap on the Butt; Your fun.

-Holding you tight pressed against each other; I want you.

-Looking into each other's Eyes; I like you, for who you are.

-Playing with Hair; Let's fool around.

-Arms around the Waist; I like you too much to let go.

-Laughing while Kissing; I am completely comfortable with you.

Advice;  
Don't ask for a kiss, take one.

 ** **Copy and paste into your profile, then Bold the ones that apply.****

 ** **SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.****

I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.  
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.  
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz  
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.  
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.  
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.  
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.  
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.  
 ** **I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.****  
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.  
 ** **I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.****  
 ** **I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.****  
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.  
 ** **I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.****  
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.  
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals  
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.  
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.  
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.  
 ** **I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.****  
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.  
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.  
 ** **I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.****  
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.  
 ** **I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.****  
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...  
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore  
 ** **I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.****  
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.  
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.  
 ** **I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.****  
 ** **I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.****  
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.  
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.  
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.  
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.  
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals  
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".  
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!  
 ** **I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.****  
 ** **I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.****  
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.  
 ** **I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.****  
 ** **I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.****  
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.  
 ** **I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.****  
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.  
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.  
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.  
 ** **I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.****  
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.  
 ** **I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.****  
 ** **I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO****  
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.  
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited  
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13  
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy  
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy  
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas  
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction  
 ** **Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude****  
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.  
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.  
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.  
 ** **I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.****  
 ** **I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.****  
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff  
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks  
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7  
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.  
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.  
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.  
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.  
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA  
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect  
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black  
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil (So I've been told)  
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.  
 ** **I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.****  
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.  
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.  
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.  
 ** **I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.****  
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob  
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.  
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.  
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon  
 ** **I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.****  
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.  
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.  
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.  
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.  
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.  
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.  
 ** **I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.****  
 ** **I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.****  
 ** **I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.****  
 ** **I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.****  
 ** **I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.****  
 ** **I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.****  
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.  
 ** **I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.****  
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.  
 ** **I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.****  
 ** **I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.****  
 ** **I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse****  
I'm a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist  
I'm a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.  
 ** **I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.****  
 ** **I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.****  
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.  
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.  
 ** **I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak****  
 ** **I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.****  
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep  
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts (It's actually called a kilt)  
 ** **I'm a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.****  
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.  
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.  
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.  
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.  
 ** **I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.****  
 ** **I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.****  
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.  
 ** **I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE****.  
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!  
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.  
 ** **I'm WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.****  
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE  
 ** **I'm not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser****  
 ** **I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy****  
 ** **I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.****  
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.  
 ** **I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins****  
 ** **I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan****  
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion  
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.  
 ** **I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.****  
 ** **I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.****  
 ** **I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.****  
 ** **I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.****  
 ** **I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.****  
 ** **I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.****  
 ** **I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.****  
 ** **I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.****  
 ** **I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED****  
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast  
 ** **I like GAMES, ANIME and COM be childishICS, so I MUST****  
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.  
 ** **I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.****  
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.  
 ** **I'm STRONG so I MUST be stupid****.  
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo's  
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times  
I'm GAY so I'm after EVERY straight guy around.  
 ** **I don't want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.****  
 ** **I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.****  
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.  
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.  
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.  
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.  
 ** **I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist****  
 ** **I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake****  
 ** **I DON"T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems****  
 ** **I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist or a pyromaniac.****

Stop the stereotypes!

 ** **Posted from Claire Lanser's profile****

 ** **This is pretty cool, and it actually worked for me. Have fun (:****

1\. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

2\. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow?

3\. Your first initial?

4\. Your month of birth?

5\. Which color do you like more, black or white?

6\. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

7\. Your favorite number?

8\. Do you like California or Florida more?

9\. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?

10\. Write down a wish (a realistic one).

Are you done?

Are you sure?

Really?

Okay... If so, scroll down (don't cheat-)

THE ANSWERS

1\. You are completely in love with this person.

2\. If you choose:

Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.

Black: You are conservativeand aggressive.

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.

3\. If your initial is:

A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom.

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4\. If you were born in:

Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but the memories will last forever.

July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life changing experience for the good.

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soulmate.

5\. If you choose...

Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6\. This person is your best friend.

7\. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.

8\. If you choose...

California: You like adventure.

Florida: You are a laidback person.

9\. If you choose...

Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.

Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10\. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday

Take 3 minutes and try this...it will freak you out...BUT NO CHEATING!

This game has a funny/spooky outcome.

Don't read ahead...just do it in order! It's worth a try.

First…get a pen and paper.

When you actually choose names, make sure it's people you actually know and go with your first instinct.

Scroll down one line at a time...and don't read ahead or you'll ruin it!

1\. First, write the numbers 1 through 11 in a column.

2\. Then, beside numbers 1 and 2, write down any two numbers you want.

3\. Beside the 3 and 7, write down the names of members of the opposite sex.

4\. Write anyone's name (like friends or family...) in the 4th, 5th, and 6th spots.

5\. Write down four song titles in 8,9,10, and 11. (Go with your instincts!)

6\. Finally, make a wish. And now the key for the game..

1\. You must tell (the number in space 2) people about this game.

2\. The person in space 3 is the one that you love.

3\. The person in 7 is one you like but can't work out.

4\. You care most about the person you put in 4.

5\. The person you name in number 5 is the one who knows you very well.

6\. The person you name in 6 is your lucky star.

7\. The song in 8 is the song that matches with the person in number 3.

8\. The title in 9 is the song for the person in 7.

9\. The tenth space is the song that tells you most about YOUR mind.

10\. 11 is the song telling you how you feel about life NOW...post this bulletin (don't reply) within the hour. IF you do, your wish will come true... If you don't it will become the opposite

I stopped fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now.

I'm smiling. That alone should scare you.

If at first you don't suceed, destroy all evidence you tried.

I'm being nice. That means I'm plotting against you.

Saracasm is just one service I offer.

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

The buddy system is essential: it gives the enemy something else to shoot at.

If you think I'm weird, you should meet my friends.

Most people are stupid. It's mostly because they think they're smart.

Silence is golden. Ducktape is silver.

When you cry, I cry, when you laugh, I laugh, when you jump of a cliff, I laugh harder.

You're not breaking the law unless you're caught.

It's my way or the highway. Get used to it.

A friend will take your umbrella in the rain. A best friend will take your umbrella from you and scream"Run idiot run!".

A friend will bail you out of of jail. A best friend will be siting next to you in jail saying" Lets do it again!"

A friend will help you move your couch. A best friend will help you move the bodies.

A friend will give you a shoulder to cry on. A best friend tells you to suck it up, and beat up the person who made you cry.

A friend will hide you when you're running from the police. A best friend is probably the reason why you're running.

A friend only lasts a little while, but a best friend will be with you for eternity. Which would you rather have?

Make a wish, and hope it happens...

I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back.

The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.

The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."

Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''

The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''

Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.

The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.

Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.

"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."

I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her afterall, and not to worry.

But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there."

His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''

My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall."

Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing.

He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister."

Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.

I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''

"OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough."

I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it.

There was enough for the doll and even some spare money.

The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!"

Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!''

"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''

"My mommy loves white roses."

A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.

I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.

Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy?

Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.

She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. T

he love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. A

nd in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.

Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message. 2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart

Here are 25 ways to annoy your parents

1\. Follow them around the house everywhere.

2\. Moo when they say your name.

3\. Pretend to have amnesia.

4\. Say everything backwards.

5\. Run into walls.

6\. Say that wearing clothes is against your religion.

7\. Go into their room at 4 in the morning and say "Good Morning Sunshine!"

8\. Snort loudly when you laugh and then laugh harder.

9\. Say all of the words in a film.

10\. Pluck someone's hair out and yell "DNA!"

11\. Wear a sticker that says "I'm a retard!"

12\. Talk to a pen.

13\. Have 20 imaginary friends that you talk to ALL the time.

14\. Try and climb the wall.

15\. In public yell "NO MUM I WILL NOT SNOG YOU!"

16\. Put pegs on your nose and eyes.

17\. Switch the light button on and off for awhile. Then say "Oh...I get it!"

18\. Eat your hair.

19\. Hold their hand and whisper to them "I see dead people."

20\. When you shower or bath yell "I'm drowning!"

21\. At everything they say yell "LIAR!"

22\. Pretend to be a phone.

23\. Try to swim in the floor.

24\. Tap on their door all night

25\. When they say a word from a song you know burst into that song

 ** **things to annoy your parents even more**** :

1\. take their car keys and put them somewhere else, and when they ask you about it, say "maybe a ghost took it"

2\. get a pinata made to look like them

3\. when they ask you what their doing, say "existing"

4\. whenever they tell you something say "oh my god, no way"

5\. when they say the name of a store, say their slogan or sing their song.

6\. pretened to vaccum with your imaginary vaccum (don't forget to make noises)

7\. when the phone rings, yell at it " HELLO? HELLO? I CAN HEAR YOU! HELLO?

8\. put a mouse trap infront of the computer mouse.

9\. ask your parent a question, then the next day ask it again, and the next day, etc. until you forget

10\. when they yell at you, tell them to use their inside voice.

11\. have all of your friends call you in one night. (it really works. i tried this one! X3)

12\. wear a turtle neck and follo them around saying "turtle turtle"

13\. speak to them in another language (if you don't know any, either make one up, or use baka(idiot))

14\. wear a bucket on your head (i know someone who did it and it works really well)

15\. sing everything you say

16\. draw a face on a balloon and call it wilson and carry it around, constantly talking to it.

17\. fall in love with a wine bottle

18\. when their friends come over pretend to be drunk with your wine bottle spouse

im not to sure weather or not I should put this up but This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground when she was still alive. The murderer chanted,"Toma sota balcu" as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.

 ** **When she walks away from you mad, follow her****

 ** **When she stare's at your mouth, Kiss her****

 ** **When she pushes you or hit's you, Grab her and dont let go****

 ** **When she start's cussing at you, Kiss her and tell her you love her****

 ** **When she's quiet, Ask her what's wrong****

 ** **When she ignore's you, Give her your attention****

 ** **When she pull's away, Pull her back****

 ** **When you see her at her worst, Tell her she's beautiful****

 ** **When you see her start crying, Just hold her and dont say a word****

 ** **When you see her walking, Sneak up and hug her waist from behind****

 ** **When she's scared, Protect her****

 ** **When she lay's her head on your shoulder, Tilt her head up and kiss her****

 ** **When she steal's your favorite hat, Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night****

 ** **When she tease's you, Tease her back and make her laugh****

 ** **When she doesnt answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay****

 ** **When she look's at you with doubt, Back yourself up****

 ** **When she say's that she like's you, she really does more than you could understand****

 ** **When she grab's at your hands, Hold her's and play with her fingers****

 ** **When she bump's into you, bump into her back and make her laugh****

 ** **When she tell's you a secret, keep it safe and untold****

 ** **When she looks at you in your eyes, don't look away until she does****

 ** **When she misses you, she's hurting inside****

 ** **When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away****

 ** **When she says its over, she still wants you to be hers****

 ** **When she repost this bulletin, she wants you to read it****

 ** **Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.****

 ** **When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go****

 ** **When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you****

 ** **Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her****

 ** **Call her before you sleep and after you wake up****

 ** **Treat her like she's all that matters to you.****

 ** **Tease her and let her tease you back****

 ** **Stay up all night with her when she's sick****

 ** **Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid****

 ** **Give her the world****

 ** **Let her wear your clothes****

 ** **When she's bored and sad, hang out with her****

 ** **Let her know she's important****

 ** **Kiss her in the pouring rain****

 ** **When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Who's ass am I kicking babe?"****

 ** **If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will : Call you. Kiss you. Love you. Text you.****

Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

My mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it's gone.

I'm the kind of girl who would fall flat on my face, get up, laugh my head off, and say " That was fun!"

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most."

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed."

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

Was that an earthquake, or did I just rock your world?

My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary.

Did you know Sarcasm is your body's natural defense against stupidity?

Never knock on Death's door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hate that.

Paper may beat rock, but cannon ball make big hole in paper.

The pen may be mightier than the sword, but my keyboard can crush your crummy pen!

Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

Don't follow me, I'm lost too.

This is Bob. Bob likes sharp things. I suggest you run from Bob.

Definition of Your Mom: How to answer a question when you're bored

Definition of homework: Some form of crude mind control still used in some primitive areas.

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff.

I'm not afraid of Death, what's it gonna do kill me?

I'll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at people you hate.

It doesn't matter whether the glass is half empty or half full just drink it and get it over with.

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

The world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER.

So what if we act like immature idiots? We're having fun.

When French people swear do they say pardon my English?

Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait' just the leftovers from the people that got there first?

If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures'?

Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa beans, and all beans are a vegetable?

Life sucks and then you die.

Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?

Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?

Why do people say, "You can't have your cake and eat it too"? Why would someone get cake if they can't eat it?

"When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade"

Don't mess with me I've got a stick.

Darth Vader- "Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!" Luke Skywalker- "Nah, the rebels have cake." Darth Vader- "ooh! Can I be a rebel?!"

I smile because I have no idea what's going on!

Life was so simple when boys had cooties

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

Boys are like slinkies, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

I agree with the dictionary.

Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

I don't obsess! I think intensely.

Of course I'm talking to myself. Who else can I trust?

Let me know if anything I say offends you, I might wanna offend you later.

One way to figure out how things work, push all the buttons!

When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling

When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Sing "I'm Off to See the Wizard" when sent to the Headmasters office.

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.

All the good ones are gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.

Stupid shiny Volvo owner.

The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.

"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it."

"Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it."

"Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else"

"Real girls aren't perfect, perfect girls aren't real."

"I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I'm not."

"What is easy is not always right, and what is right is not always easy."

A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.

I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Death is God's way of saying "You're fired." Suicide is Human's way of saying "You can't fire me- I quit!"

Heaven doesn't want me, and Hell's afraid I'll take over.

"He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron."

"If you know me, chances are you hate me."

Shut up voices or I'll poke you with a fork

If at first you don't succeed skydiving isn't for you.

Those who throw objects at crocodiles will be asked to retrieve them.

Set sail in a general that way direction.

It's always the last place you look.

Of course it is why would I keep looking after I've found it?

I'm sick of following my dreams, I'm just gonna ask where they're going and hook up with them later.

Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in you face?

All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

Stupidity is not a crime so you're free to go.

Excuse me... have you seen my sanity... I think I lost it

 ** **My best friend is insane! If you agree, or if you have an insane friend, then copy this into your profile. (Yeah, you know who you are)****

 ** **If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.****

 ** **If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.****

 ** **If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.****

 ** **If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.****

 ** **If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile.****

 ** **If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.****

 ** **If you think that girls are equals to boys, copy and paste this on your profile.****

 ** **If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile****

 ** **If you think the Cocoa Puff Turkey Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.****

 ** **Some people are like slinkies...they're really good for nothing...but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs! If you agree with this, copy and paste this into your profile****

 ** **If you've ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile****

 ** **If you've ever randomly fallen out of your chair, copy this into your profile****

 ** **If you've ever fallen going up the stairs, copy this into your profile Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which makes weird good.****

 ** **If you are weird and proud of it, copy & paste this onto your profile ****

****If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile****

 ** **If you have ever thought of something funny, started laughing, and fell & hit your head on something hard, and ended up laughing harder than you were before, copy and paste this into your profile ****

****Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"****

 ** **If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile****

 ** **If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile****

 ** **If you still have to think 'righty tighty, left loosy' when opening, well, anything, copy this into your profile.****

 ** **If you think that 'morning people' should be driven off the face of the planet so they can spread their 6-AM cheer to say, Martians, copy this into your profile.****

 ** **If you can raed tihs, cpoy tihs itno yuor polrfie, and sea if ohtres can raed it. (P.S. If dyslexia is like this, I think I could handle it)****

 ** **Copied from bluephoenix65069's profile****


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